It was a weeknight, of course

Posted: April 9, 2009 in home, Uncategorized
Tags: , ,

I lost about two hours of sleep last night somewhere between 2:00 am and 4:00 am. Lack of sleep hardly affects me at all but the interruption of sleep does so in a big way. Especially during these hours.

I was awakened sometime after 2:00 am by the yapping of a little dog right outside of my bedroom window. I tried to ignore it. I tried to fall back asleep but after ten minutes of this it knew it wasn’t going to happen unless I chased the dog away. I got out of bed, put on some clothes, went outside and did just that. I came back inside, angrily took my clothes back off and got back into bed.

Just as soon as I got comfortable the dog came back and started yapping outside my window again. I gave it time but it never stopped. I got back out of bed and chased the little mutt off. I got back into bed and the yapping started back up again outside my window. I went back outside but this time I started throwing rocks at this little shit-head dog. Of course, it took off. I went back to bed. It started again.

At about 4:00 I was really, really pissed off. Before, I was just sort of lobbing the rocks at her to run her off but this point I was ready to really bean the shit out of this little Curr so I could salvage some sleep. But she ran off again.

I fell back into bed and it wasn’t 60 seconds before that shit started again. I was so pissed off this time that I’m not sure if I was fully dressed when I busted out of the door. This time the little dog didn’t run off like before even though she knew I was extremely pissed off. Instead, she kept yapping away under a car next to my truck.

Then I thought, “She’s cornered another cat.” I got on my hands and knees to shoo the cat away so this damned dog would shut up. Instead, I found myself nose to nose with the biggest damned possum I’ve ever seen. It was bigger than that little dog. It didn’t hiss at me though. It just looked at me with it’s crossed eyes.

I was so pissed off. Now I had to chase off a possum to get this dog to shut up. I shouted at it. Didn’t work. I waved my hands, shouted and even poked it a few times. Nope. I resorted to the rocks I had used on the dog earlier. I started flinging the rocks at it but it just didn’t care. The problem was that it was under a car. I couldn’t really do anything about this without reaching under there and dragging it out with my hand (which I wasn’t about to do). I decided that the only chance I had of getting this possum on it’s way was to start hitting it a little harder with the rocks. I did but as they were bouncing off it’s side, all it did was look at me. I didn’t want to hurt him but I really needed to salvage what sleep I could. I started putting some mustard on these rocks and I finally got it’s attention. He finally lumbered out from under the car and across the parking lot toward the street with that little shit-head dog yapping at him all the way. The racket slowly faded and I finally got back to sleep only to get up in two hours.

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Comments
  1. Laurie says:

    As an apartment dweller I have ear plugs at my bedside. I don’t like sleeping with them, but they work pretty well and usually the noisy neighbor with their annoying music will stop after a few hours. Although I’m not sure if they would have been effective against a yappy dog.

  2. That is crazy. I would have been furious.

  3. Scott says:

    Hilarious!

    I’m totally deaf in my left ear–always have been, for all I know. And I sleep on my right side, so almost nothing keeps me from getting to sleep, or wakes me. Much of the time this “curse” is a blessing!

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